quarta-feira, 7 de janeiro de 2009

Let the seasons begin - it rolls right on

Início, início...tudo tão velho.

Acabo de acabar com tantas coisas, mas é início.
A estação deve começar, e embora eu possa ficar apenas observando e vendo as flores surgirem ou não, é assim que começo, apenas terminando.

Sabe que de todos os finais de ano, este foi o que eu nem percebi? Os fogos pipocavam no céu, as pessoas se abraçando, festejando algo. Apenas observei, tirei algumas fotos, é verdade. Fotos de outras vidas.


Ontem, enquanto assistia ao jornal com todos aqueles estilhaços, Ana Clara me perguntou se aquilo era filme, se era mentira. Eu respondi que sim. Por que nunca sei o que dizer, ando levando a vida como em "La vita è bella".

E embora haja tantas tristezas, permaneço numa felicidade sem euforia, e parece inadequado dizer-se feliz em 2009, olhando a capa da folha de hoje.

Realmente é inadequado engolir o papai noel de dezembro, as mandingas de janeiro, a praia, enfim.

E o texto vai ficando assim adolescente, todo se encaixando num mundo. Talvez eu seja esta aí, a melancolia.

O jornal de hoje nem embrulhará nada amanhã, ele vai para o lixo, para a chuva do mês que vem.

A Ana Clara vai para a escola de sempre, a particular e retrógada, vai para o ballet. Eu vou dar aulas, eu vou fazer francês, vou cultivar um mestrado. É dia qualquer.

Ps.:And it rips through the silence, all that is left is all that i hide.

26 comentários:

Anônimo disse...

Como sempre, seus textos me arrepiam. aqui tudo é assim, uma coisa pronta, uma coisa direta de se ler. não sei se me faço compreender. no meu cantinho é sempre uma enxurrada, aqui vem o x da questão.

Eu sou dessas que gosta de natal e ano novo, gosta de família e festa, gosta de criança e tem uma ingenuidade difícil de arrancar.

Mas enquanto cá comemoramos, outros morrem. E quantas crianças do tamanho da Aninha vivem no meio dessa realidade que só devia ser filme, nunca devia ser vida. Quantas crianças sem nem saber o que é morte, morrem... E quanta gente imbecil dizendo coisas imbecis, fazendo coisas imbecis, sendo imbecil, imbecil imbecil... Dá mesmo uma sensação de impotência. Eu não tinha visto a capa da folha e foi mais um soco dessa realidade tão amarga, tão cruel... O que mais me choca é matar gente assim descaradamente... Matar e dizer que mata. Matar crianças e dizer que está matando crianças... Parece mesmo a segunda guerra, aqueles anúncios para combater judeus, que eles eram como ratos e deveriam todos morrer. É a mesma coisa mais de sessenta anos depois. Só dá para causar nojo mesmo.

Enquanto isso a gente segue a vida de cada dia... Dá uma impressão de mesquinharia... Nossos sofrimentos parecem tão imbecis, nós parecemos tão imbecis por não poder fazer nada...

"Uma escola retrógrada". Como eu disse vc é sempre azedinha. E bem certa nesse ponto. Engraçado, o mundo muda, muda e as pessoas parecem estar na mesma. Estáticas, preconceituosas, criminosas. O mundo muda, muda e tudo até piora. A educação muda muda e as escolas na mesma... Tudo fica na teoria. Uma teoria de um mundo melhor...

Dá vontade mesmo, Lu, de ter pra sempre cinco anos para a mãe dizer que é filme, que não tem ninguém morrendo. Infelizmente nem toda criança tem o direito de ser criança, de ser ingênua...

Beijos pra vc. Vamos tentar cultivar alguma coisa por aqui... Hoje eu tive uma notícia bonita de que há pessoas tentando mudar algumas coisas por aqui. Depois te conto... Vamos tentar não perder um restinho de esperança, de ingenuidade, de sonho...

Anônimo disse...

viu como eu falo demais? sempre, sempre.

desculpa.. :)

bjinho.

Thiago Paulo disse...

Olá...Tudo bem?! Então, eu estou bem curioso para ver o que Tim Burtun vai fazer com Alice.... Espero que fique bom!!!

Há, pode me add no Orkut, sim!!! Até mais......

E só em pensar que a gente precisa começar esse ano tudo de novo...já dá uma preguiça :)

Abraços...

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